January is at an end and I’m wondering if your new year’s resolutions are still going strong after 31 days. In January last year, among other intentions, I resolved to defrost my freezer and failed spectacularly. My abject failure (which only came to light a few weeks ago when I was contemplating this blog) spurred me on to rectify the situation if only to curb my self-dissatisfaction. Besides there was an additional 12-month icy build-up such that we could barely manoeuvre the drawers in and out. Happily, I can report that my freezer is now fully functional. And an unexpected bonus were the shrieks of delight emitted by my hairdryer-wielding daughter when great clumps of ice gave in to gravity. It’s safe to say that I’m not a subscriber to the whole new year’s resolution thing. However, I do unashamedly love the concept of new-year-equals-fresh-start. I get the same kick out of a Monday –every week is a new beginning.

Like most people I struggle with the little things that can make a big difference. Being a life coach does not make me immune to these things. Personally, I’m good at the big stuff, most notably a change of career that took eight years to fully accomplish. During this period I studied for four qualifications whilst working part-time and becoming a mother three times over. I credit Stephen R Covey’s The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People for empowering me to take control of my life in this way. It was his passage on important-but-non-urgent-activity that inspired me to enrol on the psychology degree which had previously seemed quite out of reach. My most recent ‘big stuff’ has been to take on the renovation of a very run-down cottage and transform it into my company’s shiny new premises (with massive thanks and respect to my talented husband). Oh, and by the way, I finally ditched a lifelong habit of working for other people in favour of following more precisely my own passions. As I said, I’m good at the big stuff.

What I struggle to implement are the habit-changers, the small acts that when repeated regularly bring forth a subtle conversion which changes the direction of our lives. Whoever said ‘Don’t sweat the small stuff’ was missing the point. Aristotle once wrote ‘We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.’ This startling insight frequently occupies space in my brain. Surely, never a truer word was spoken. And yet when it comes to being a healthier me, I just can’t seem to sustain the small acts long enough for them to become fully fledged, no-excuses ingrained habits. For instance, nutrition and fitness are very important to me. On an intellectual level, that is. Unfortunately, you can’t tell this by looking at me. Having given much thought to my successes and failures in this area, I have figured out that my commitment to exercise is the first thing to go when I am under time pressure (which is pretty much all of the time). My diet goes to pot when I am stressed. I remember telling myself that my habits would change when I finally stopped tunnelling towards assignment deadlines but two months on and it is no better. I have swapped hand-in dates for self-imposed work targets.

It’s easy to assume that because I’m a coach I can do all of these things effortlessly. The reality is I’m just like everyone else. So what do we all need to successfully make changes in our lives? Experience tells me its permission, self-belief and accountability. To make any headway with my nutrition and fitness goals I need to focus on giving myself permission. Having recently started a new business and embarked on a life of financial uncertainty I feel under enormous pressure to always be working when I am not actively mothering. Of course, the truth of it is that my health couldn’t be more important – it enables me to work, to earn and to take care of my family (or not).

Thirty-one days in to 2017, how are you faring? Do you need permission or self-belief or accountability to successfully make changes in your life? Life coaching offers all three. I can support you to understand what exactly you want to achieve and how to sufficiently underpin your motivation with your core beliefs and values. We can throw out the attitudes and behaviours that are not serving you well. Instead, you will feel inspired to take control. So, when you are ready to try a different approach, to achieve much more and more quickly than you would left to your own devices why not contact me for an initial consultation free of charge? Tomorrow is a new day (a new month) and a fresh start.